• On Friday nights, we watch Minute to Win It reruns on some obscure cable channel. The kids love it, and I enjoy knitting in peace for an hour and making
incessant occasional snarky comments about Guy Fieri. So over the weekend, I had a brilliant idea and spent $20 and two hours gathering materials and making up games for the kids to play a home version.
I wrote out a bunch of challenges on index cards, put them in a box with assorted ping-pong balls, drinking straws, chop sticks, etc, and rounded up the kids, feeling like a Super Hero. They were thrilled.
For about 34 seconds.
Which is how long it took Little to fail at her first challenge, then collapse dramatically on the floor and LITERALLY start kicking her arms and legs in a whiny, whiny, whiny tantrum while I stared at her in shock.
She went to the corner a second time for whining, and Big went for being a grabby bossypants, and finally I took all my toys and left. My hopes for a tutorial that would go viral on Pinterest and bring me worldwide acclaim, dashed. Also I will apparently not be writing any parenting books anytime soon.
• I made a few comments about P-Tracker on Twitter last week –
– and no one knew what I was talking about. P-Tracker is a great app I have on my phone that lets me know when that time of the month is coming so I am not caught off-guard without a supply of chocolate. You’d think after TWENTY-EIGHT years (gah. old much?) of this nonsense, I’d know the routine, but no. Every month I’m like, “oh right. this again.”
Jim’s figured out that practically all emotional outbursts that occur during the Week in Question can be handled by shaking a Lays bag to distract me, then tossing it away while he flees the area.
• Happy Monday, y’all! I don’t care what the calendar says, this is the real first Monday of the new year. So let’s get out there and kill it! You go ahead, I’ll catch up…
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