Random Monday

In CategoryRandom Monday
ByDeb


beautiful Oregon sunset. yes, it really looked like this.

• Thanksgiving! How was it? I hope everyone had a good weekend with lots of pie and minimal family drama.

• Did you shop the Black Friday sales? What’d you get? Here in the wilds of Oregon there is not a lot of shopping, which is just as well, since all the commercials and One Day Only! coupons definitely would have had me on a 24 hour binge. What was your biggest score? Tell me, so I can feel the thrill of the kill vicariously.

• Every day for the last week, Big hollers down the stairs, “By the way! It’s raining!”

On the 8th day, I rolled my eyes and hollered back, “By the way, we’re in OREGON.”

Homeschooling!

• Speaking of homeschooling, I really must insist that everyone go read one of my favorite bloggers, Grit. She’s British. There’s extra cachet in having imaginary friends from other countries, don’t you think? I’m international that way. Check out this post, this one, and maybe this one, for starters.

• I got my hair cut last week, and also asked for a little brow-and-lip wax. When the girl was finished waxing, she asked me if I wanted her to get my chin while she was at it.

And then I died.

• Happy Monday, y’all! Link up your own Randomness below! Please. I need to take my mind off this Chin Situation.



Thanksgiving 2012

In CategoryNavel Gazing
ByDeb

Happy Thanksgiving, my lovelies!

I am thankful for my friends who live in my computer. Hope you are all having a terrific weekend.

(yes, all those hats were handknit. I’m sure you were wondering, if not plain burning with envy)

It was just a burgler alarm

In CategoryNavel Gazing
ByDeb

So Monday morning at some-unholy-number-that-starts-with-a-five, Jim and I were awakened by a siren.

Wait, let me back up.

Sunday night when I went to bed, the Weather Channel app on my phone showed 3 Severe Weather Alerts – high wind, flooding, and landslides.

Then we awoke to a really loud siren. We are about 100 yards from the beach, six blocks from the mouth of a flood-happy river, and at the base of a hill.

We stumbled around for a bit, peering into the dark and trying to see where it was coming from. We even called the police station to see if there it was a Flood Alarm or Landslide Alarm or Holy Crap The World Is Ending, Get The Hell Out Alarm.

The switchboard operator assured us that she didn’t know what it was. Which was comforting.

Eventually, it got a little lighter outside, and Jim decided to go investigate. Just as the door clicked shut behind him, I saw that he had forgotten his phone.

I promptly chastised him when he came back in. “Dude! You can’t just go outside in a storm like that and forget your phone! What if it was the Zombie Apocalypse and you had no way to tell me?”

“And what would you do if it were?” he asked dryly.

“I would grab the kids and run while you sacrificed yourself for our safety, OBVIOUSLY.” **

Silence.

“Well, if zombies are coming, I suggest you put on some pants.”

** That IS obvious right? Isn’t that in the Husband Handbook? That they sacrifice themselves for us? Maybe laying on the ground, with one arm outstretched, gasping in a Captain Kirk-esque voice, “getting…cold……can’t…feel…my…legs…….save yourself….”

Speaking of the Husband Handbook, Jim’s mom called on Sunday. He was watching football, the kids were playing legos, I was knitting, and it was one of those lovely afternoons where no one is fighting over toys and it’s not time to cook dinner yet. I was half-listening to his end of the conversation when I heard him invite her to come visit us. Without discussing it with me first. Just all of a sudden, he’s giving her directions on what airport to fly into.

I think Jim needs Re-Education Camp.

Random Monday – Pinterest Edition

In CategoryRandom Monday
ByDeb

• I love Pinterest. I do. But I find that Sarcastic Deb chimes in a lot when I am surfing Pinterest. She has a lot of opinions, and she’s kind of snotty.

• For example, all these projects that call for making furniture out of pallets. Where do you acquire pallets? Where do you find decent ones that aren’t all mangled and broken? Making furniture out of pallets will be dirt cheap until the instant I go to Home Depot and then they’ll inform me that pallets are $100 each.

Side Rant: My personal style is sort of Mid-Century Modern meets Rustic Minimalism, if that’s a thing. I love a lot of mid-century furniture. Mad Men has ruined this for me, because now all the really cool stuff isn’t sold at thrift stores anymore, it’s at “antique stores” and it costs a mint. Thanks a lot, television.

• Also, what are all these little bird jokes I see all over Pinterest? “Mustaches are the new ‘put a bird on it.'”  What is Put a Bird on it? Was that some kind of design trend thing and I missed it? I don’t have any birds. Or mustaches. Well, I have a mustache, but I wax it. Shut up.

• How about this idea that you scent your toilet paper rolls with essential oil? Listen, at my house we have 4 people who are all here, all day. We got through at least a roll of tp a day. It irks me enough to spend money on something whose sole purpose is to be thrown away, I certainly don’t have time to SCENT MY TOILET PAPER EVERY DAY.

Gah. I am 41 years old, you know.

• Or pins that suggest making your own paint out of flour and cornstarch and water. I even saw one called Potato Paint. Made with MASHED POTATOES. You know what smearing mashed potatoes all over your walls sounds like to me? A dinner invitation to every bug in the vicinity of your house.

• I saw a pin saying you could make an ottoman if you upholstered a styrofoam cooler.

A STYROFOAM COOLER.

How is that even remotely practical? It’s an ottoman you can’t actually put your feet on, no one can sit on it, and if you have any other humans in your house, it will get completely wrecked inside 15 minutes. And then you will cry, because UPHOLSTERING STYROFOAM sounds time-consuming.

• How about making an American Girl closet out of old cereal boxes? I don’t know what kind of children other people have, but mine aren’t the variety that can play with anything made of cardboard without annihilating it. Heed my words, people: covering up a cereal box in fancy wrapping paper and pretending it’s American Girl furniture will only lead to heartache for all parties.

Don’t even get me started on these ideas that require me to save hundreds of toilet paper tubes for months before they can be crafted into something that will STILL BE CARDBOARD when you are finished.

• Speaking of Pinterest, how do they make any money? They must be spending a FORTUNE on servers and hosting, but how are they paying for it? Pinterest doesn’t have ads. And we all use it and pin stuff and link to pins for free. Are they sinking a ton of money into it in the hopes that it will be acquired by Google (who will then ruin it) for ten million dollars? What do you think? I’m serious. I want to know.

• Happy Monday, y’all! Link up with your own randomness below!