Wrap-Up: Week 1

In CategoryHome Schooling

• We finished Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, which everybody loved, and started The Little House in the Big Woods, which everybody also loves. We bought several books and watched a National Geographic documentary about Lewis and Clark. Sacagawea was an amazing woman. I like showing my children strong women, and she obliged.

We talked about making our own butter. Does that count for anything? No?

• Jim took the kids to a little children’s art studio kind of place and they made melty-crayon art pieces. In my heart this doesn’t count for anything at all, I mention it only to beef up my stats.

• We went to the St. Louis Zoo, which has FREE admission, but which makes up for it by charging $15 for parking and highway robbery prices for water. Who cares though, when they have elephants? Also, the tiger yowled at us, which was very exciting.

• On Monday, Big instructed Little on her first THREE chapters of Math-U-See Primer while I surfed the internet. Homeschool WIN!

• Speaking of Math, Little has completed over ONE HUNDRED pages this week, so enthusiastically that I have to MAKE her take a break. I vacillate between thinking, “Wow! Unschooling ROCKS! My child totally figured out how to count stuff without the aid of worksheets! Maybe this is a sign that I really can surf Pinterest all day with no consequences…!” and “Jeez, Deb, you SUCK. Little has CLEARLY been ready for Kindergarten for a long time and you were too busy surfing Pinterest to notice. Quit sucking, you sucky suck-head.”

It’s like a carnival in my head. This is why I forget my own phone number.

Big did around 10 pages, under such severe protest that I fully expect the United Nations to show up and facilitate negotiations.

• I remembered to get First Day of School pictures, but I am not sure how they turned out. My award-winning camera directions consist of saying things like “stop looking like weirdos.”