Top Moments of the Week

In CategoryNavel Gazing

• Monday: Both Big and Little have ringworm on their feet. Spent $346 on athlete’s foot cream, blowing my new cash-only budget 3 days after it was implemented.

• Tuesday: Became slightly exasperated that Little kept demanding to do schoolwork all day. Super! Homeschool! Mom!

• Wednesday: Tell kids they may not have the extra pillows in their beds, as they have been on the floor and are probably covered in scorpions. Possibly the worst mom ever.

• Thursday:  “You may not use the word ‘ass.’ That is a grown-up word.” (oh right. I meant to stop swearing.)

• Friday: Jim announces he may have to go on a work trip to California, leaving me alone in a strange city that’s infested with scorpions.