Random Monday – Now with More TeeVee!

In CategoryRandom Monday

After suffering through 3 stupid hours of stupid football yesterday, I sort of made Jim watch the Emmys with me.

We normally don’t watch award shows because a) he hates them, and b) all that self-congratulatory narcissism is kind of ridiculous. However, I love television and they were playing outside when it started so who was gonna stop me?

Riveting and Profound Thoughts

• That dress of Amy Poehler’s was the most hideous thing I have seen since Cee-Lo Green wore the giant bird outfit at the Grammys earlier this year. Observe:

It looks like it was made from recycled Jazzercise fabric à la Spandex Barbie –

 or stolen from someone who attends Star Trek conventions as Counselor Troi –

Amy Peohler will be on a Worst Dressed List somewhere next week, mark my words. 

• There was a teeny bit of an awkward moment in my house when I saw Timothy Olyphant on the screen and blurted out, “oooh, Hottie!” and then Jim was all, “excuse me?” and I was all, “look, it’s no secret around here how I feel about Timothy Olyphantastic.

And then I spent the rest of the evening pointing out how smokin’ Sophia Vergara was to make up for it. Because I am an Awesome Wife like that.

Hottie –

and Not Too Shabby, Either –

• We were saved from listening to the acceptance speeches by the kids, who kept manufacturing situations that required my attention. Like one time when Big was trying to get a Fisher-Price toy airplane to fly and he chucked it right into his sister’s eye. I totally paused the teevee to comfort/discipline the injured/offender. Because I am an Awesome Mom like that.

She settled down, but quickly revved back up when I wondered aloud if she would get a shiner. I fixed that by telling her how tough she’d look, which cheered her considerably. I’m a little concerned she kind of wants a black eye now.

Earlier, she stood at the top of the stairs, and announced she was Super! Little! and was going to fly down to me. I asked her to please not hurt herself, which prompted eye-rolling and an exasperated “Mommy, I said I was SUPER Little.” (unspoken: omfg mom, keep UP)

I love that girl, but I swear about 90% of ever-growing population of gray hairs on my head can be attributed to her.

• Happy Monday!