I started it last year and it was supposed to be a Christmas gift for my mother-in-law.
But then she left town for 6 months before I could give it to her, and I sort of….forgot about finishing it.
And she’s coming to visit on Friday.
Like, tomorrow Friday.
So that is what I will be doing today.
Think kind thoughts.
It’ll be fine.
Probably.
• I LOVE PINTEREST. I cannot get enough. CAN. NOT. It’s like internet crack! It’s so much better than clipping stuff out of magazines! A virtual magazine clip organizer! Whoever created it is a genius. Check out stuff I find neato at Not Inadequate Deb. You know, or not. Is that narcissistic? I’ll follow you back! It’s fun!
(and then later, you can recommend a 12-step program for the overuse of exclamation marks)
• That one mean girl on The Next Food Network Star needs to realize that we can all see her. I will not watch a cooking show with a mean girl. Surely Food Network knows that.
• The other day in Target, I overheard a woman talking to her pregnant sister, trying to convince her to name the baby Laney because that’s what Eminem named his daughter. I mean, Laney is a really pretty name. But the reason? Who does that?
• Also the other day in Target, they cheated me not once, but TWICE and I am still bugged about it. They overcharged me by $4 on toilet paper and then took $3 worth of coupons for something else, but didn’t scan them properly. I went to customer service and got my four dollars back (after an eternity), but didn’t notice the coupon problem until I was in the car. Dadgum it.
• I am tired of being so moody all the damn time and tried Googling “menopause grouchiness.” The only links that came up were articles on MALE menopause. Seriously?
I mean, SERIOUSLY?
A few weeks ago, one of my favorite places to buy books for the kids – Library and Educational Services - had a gigantic sale: buy $100 in books, get another $100 in books for FREE.
FREE, people.
Free is the way into my little tightwad heart.
Yesterday, the books came in the mail. I still can’t believe how many I was able to buy with my hundred bucks.
Observe:
This morning, I got another newsletter from Library and Ed announcing they were going to do it again. I was thrilled with my haul from the first sale, so I emailed them to ask if I could give out the coupon codes to my readers.
You’re Welcome.
There is only one small catch – they are a book wholesaler. They sell to educators, churches, libraries, and schools. Homeschoolers qualify as educators and can take advantage of the wholesale prices. If you aren’t a homeschooler….I’m sorry, but you’re outta luck.
What you want to do is register at Library and Ed, then after you have created an account, click this link to see the list of eligible books. They even take Paypal – a feature I truly love.
And now, for the coupon codes!
Choose $100 in books from this list. Then shop for another $100 in merchandise and get it FREE. The coupon code is $100BOOKS.
Alternatively, choose $200 in books from the same list, and get $200 in merchandise FREE. The coupon code is $200BOOKS.
If you have any trouble, email Brandon@LibraryandEd.com and I’m sure he will be able to help you. But the offer expires at midnight on Thursday, June 23rd, so act fast if this is tempting.
As per usual, I received no compensation or incentive to write about this. I like this company and think this deal is just too good not to share. Because I am super awesome that way.
• I would like my children to stop rubbing their dirt encrusted bodies all over my walls. The other day they were playing outside while I was in my office with the window open, and I heard them talking about how delightful it is to make mud out of dirt and spit.
*sigh*
When they came in, I took one look at this magical muddy elixir caked all over their backsides and told them to strip. Naturally, they leaned against the wall (because if it’s there, my children will lean on it), and smeared the vile spit-mud all over it.
• Coupon savings update: I went shopping last week to pick up a few things from Target. Last week there was a coupon in the paper for a $5 Target gift card if you bought 2 packages of paper towels or toilet paper. So I headed over there to buy handsoap, paper towels, and t.p. Total coupon savings = $11 or 15%. Eleven dollars is real money, and it’s money I would never have saved before using coupons. This is ridiculously exciting for me.
Probably I should get out more.
• My husband loves cheesecake, so when I saw a recipe for Cheesecake Cookies, I knew the kids and I would make them for Father’s Day. I just found this recipe recently, and for the life of me, I cannot remember where I got it from. If anyone has seen it out there somewhere, let me know so I can give proper credit. They were voted delicious.
Cheesecake Cookies
3/4 cup butter, softened
3 ounces cream cheese, softened
3/4 cup sugar
4 teaspoons lemon peel, shredded
2 tablespoons lemon juice
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup finely chopped pecans
1/3 cup crushed graham crackers
In a medium-size mixing bowl, beat butter and cream cheese. Add sugar, lemon peel, lemon juice, and vanilla; beat again. Mix in flour with a spoon.
Refrigerate cookie dough for 30 minutes to make it easier to work with.
Spread half of the pecan/graham cracker mixture on a piece of wax paper. Lay half the chilled dough on top of it. Shape and roll cookie log (approx 2″ in diameter), coating in crushed nut-crumb mixture. Repeat with second half of dough. Transfer rolled, coated logs to fresh sheets of waxed paper and wrap.
Chill for about two hours in the fridge, or about 30 minutes in the freezer then slice into 1/4″ thick lovely little cheesecake rounds.
Place cookies on lightly greased cookie sheets. Bake at 375-degrees for 8-10 minutes. You only want to barely brown the bottoms. Don’t overbake.
*Makes about 4 dozen. These cookies do not need to be refrigerated.
Note: I found spreading the cold cheesecake mixture over the graham cracker crumbs to be rather difficult. It kept sliding around. For the second batch, I formed a log first by wrapping the cheesecake in plastic wrap, then I rolled it in the graham cracker. That worked much better.
Sorry there is not an After picture. The were gobbled up pretty quick.
I usually make a large batch of Beer Batter Pizza Dough with my Bosch every few months or so, but there are occasionally times when I don’t have a stockpile of dough in the freezer, nor the inclination to make any. When that happens, I use this as my go to Quick Pizza Dough recipe.
Quick Pizza Dough
1 (1/4 ounce) packet yeast (1 packet = 2 1/4 teaspoons)
1 cup warm water
1 Tablespoon honey
1 Tablespoon oil
1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/4 cups whole wheat flour
1 teaspoon salt
Vermont Cheese Powder (optional, but AMAZING)
First off, let’s talk about the yeast. I don’t buy my yeast by the envelope, and every time I made something that called for 1 packet, I had to go online and find a conversion (which I have graciously provided for you here. you’re welcome). It was annoying. One day while I was on the King Arthur Flour site, I broke down and bought this awesome little spoon, which measures out the equivalent of 1 packet. I heart the little spoon, it makes me happy every time I use it. As for the honey, a lot of recipes I’ve seen don’t call for any kind of sugar, but I like to give the yeast something to eat.
Next, the flour. I usually use freshly ground whole wheat flour for baking, but for pizza dough, I like to use half AP flour. I think it makes the crust crispier.
Mix the warm water and the honey together in a bowl and stir in the yeast. You can let that sit and bloom, but I am usually too impatient and if I see one or two bubbles that’s good enough. Add the oil, then the flour and salt, and stir until it forms a ball. You can take it out and knead it for a couple of minutes if you want, but I usually sort of knead it a few times against the bottom of the bowl until it looks purty. Cover with plastic wrap and set it aside for 15 minutes – or if you are like Impatient Deb, until you have all your toppings chopped.
This recipe makes two decent sized (medium-ish?) pizzas, depending on how thick you like your crust; and you can cook it on a baking stone, pizza pan, or whatever strikes your fancy. I cut the dough in half and press it into two quarter sheet pans (about 9 1/2″ x 13″).
After pressing the dough into the pans, I pour a little olive oil into my hand and pat it on the dough, then sprinkle Vermont Cheese Powder over it.
I spend a lot of time on the King Arthur Flour website. Don’t judge.
You can leave it off, or substitute regular old Parmesan-in-the-Green-Can. Par-bake (no toppings yet) for about 9 minutes at 400°.
Remove from the oven and top as desired.
Bake for another 10-12 minutes until done.
Viola! You will be sitting down to delicious, homemade pizza in a little over a half-hour.
Which is perfect for me, because I never remember about dinner until about 5:30pm.
Happy Cooking!
Click here for a printable version of my Quick Pizza Dough.
Here is an actual email I received from my mistakenly-thinks-she’s-hilarious sister this evening:
Well, you’ve been 40 for 6 weeks now. How’s it going? Doing all right? Getting around OK?
I saw a guy in a hoveround the other day and thought of you. Would that make things easier? You may also be able to install one of those little lifts for the stairs.
Just a few thoughts,
Your Sister
Har. Har. Har.
I am at Heart of the Matter today, blathering on about organizing with these cute containers:
(don’t you hate that? “If you want to read me, click here! Dance, monkeys, DANCE!”)
• I got a spam comment the other day telling me how much he admired that I “didn’t even sound like an idiot!” Flatterer.
• I have been quite taken by the story of Congressman Wiener and the associated Weiner’s Weiner Scandal, and have spent a ridiculous amount of time emailing dirty puns to my husband. I can’t seem to stop myself. Member Wiener and his member, I mean wiener, is a gift that keeps on giving.
I heard over the weekend that Congressman Wiener is taking himself off to rehab.
Rehab?
Does Dr. Drew have a treatment program for Prominent Pictoral Peccadilloes?
Contemptible Congressional Close-ups?
Sordid Social Media Shame?
Reprehensible Representative Reprobates?
(Look, I’m sorry. It’s not your first day here. I can only hold back Hilariously Crude Deb for so long. Well, I find myself hilarious. I suppose I can’t speak for those poor humorless souls other people.)
• After I got a pedicure a few weeks ago, my daughter wanted to have her toenails painted too. And so did my son. My babies are little and want to be included in whatever I do. When I put on makeup, I tickle both noses with my makeup brush and sometimes even give them both a swipe of lip gloss. When my son wanted polish too, I could not see turning him down because of some stupid gender stereotype and making him feel bad and confused when all he wanted was some special mama time.
The young swimming instructor thought the gunmetal colored polish was cool, but the knitterly acquaintance who invited herself to lunch last week almost had a big problem with me when she hissed “why does he have nail polish on?” as though I hadn’t noticed it or something. I made a lighthearted comment about how we all enjoy a mani-pedi at our house, but I could feel my inner Fierce Mama lift her head and listen.
• Last week was hectic and exhausting, and there were a more than a few days when Sucky Yelly Mommy showed her hideous face. So when I went to My Three Rivers Home and saw this quote, I broke down in tears and cried -
I capture what I can by video, camera, journal, and mementos,
but there is nothing I can do
to capture the feel
of a one-year-old’s hug
with her little arms clinging to my neck
and her little body soft and melding into mine.
–Alice Wong
• Over the weekend, the kids called me outside to the tree that attracts ladybugs and showed me ladybug larvae! It was so exciting and I felt very smart that we could now recognize ladybug larvae for what they were instead of thinking they were some weird bug. We will definitely shop at Insect Lore again for more buggy experiments. Big is particularly interested in learning about butterflies next.
Wait! One more – Loathsome Licentious Lawmaker!
• The other day on Twitter, AnyMommy tweeted about this article: Drowning Doesn’t Look Like Drowning.
I read it and got freaked out. You should too.
• I met a knitterly acquaintance at the bookstore to knit one evening last week. She is a doctor who is finishing up her residency and is studying to take some board exam. She has a job lined up with a medical practice in Minnesota, and is moving in July. I made some off-handed comment about how she should meet my kids before she goes because a) they are awesome people and b) Big has a lot of questions about the human body and I plan on inflicting him on her.
The next day, she sent me an email that said “I’m on vacation next week, why don’t you pick a day and provide me lunch? I can meet the kids and see your house! Plus, I won’t have to worry about a meal while studying.”
And I was all “Wait….what?”
Hopefully she likes a gourmet meal consisting of I Just Scrounged This Out of the Fridge, Smell It And Tell Me If It’s Still Good.
• Last Tuesday morning at breakfast, my daughter asked me if moths have proboscises like butterflies do.
Seriously. Proboscises.
I marveled, amazed that my 4 year old knows a word like that, knows what it means, and can use it correctly in a sentence. My girl! What a brilliant creature!
Six hours later she stuffed an unripe cherry up her nose.
Seriously. A cherry. Up her nose.
I marveled again, but not for the same reasons.
That child is going to kill me.
(Yes, we got it out. I could see on my husband’s face that we were headed to the emergency room, and gave one last try at instructing her to blow her nose as hard as possible into my hand. Popped right out, along with a truly awe-inspiring amount of snot.)
Here is Part 3 of Nicole’s Coupon Manifesto! Remember, to everyone doing this experiment with me, June 5th is a big day for inserts – three this week.
The Power of Coupons
Is anyone else hearing Snap’s “I’ve got the power” playing in the background? No…hmmm…wonder what that means?
Now we’re ready to pull everything together and see what couponing can do for you. We’re going to use 7 steps to make sure that you are ready to hit the stores running.
#1 Find Coupons: Look in your Sunday papers, check out the store shelves, and watch for coupons on social media sites (facebook and twitter). If you use specialty items or have a brand favorite, write the company and let them know why you love it. Companies often will send out coupons as a thank you. Many stores accept internet printable coupons – don’t forget to check out sites like www.coupons.com; also watch for promotional mailers and coupons received in direct mail. I signed up for Home Made Simple and 4x a year I receive a booklet worth over $30 in coupons from Proctor and Gamble (Swiffer, Tide, Dawn…)
#2 Find your filing system: If you can’t find your coupons, you won’t use your coupons, so look for a system that works for you. Look at the binder system or file by insert, grab an accordion folder and sort them into that – at the very least recycle an envelope to stash your coupons in. Just remember: the more you work with your coupons, the more likely you are to use them.
#3 Don’t be timid: Contrary to what most people believe, most cashiers are not offended by couponers. Using coupons actually makes the company money, as they are reimbursed by the manufacturer the face value of the coupon plus .08 cents for each coupon they redeem. This may not sound like a lot, but you have to look at it on the scale that the store is redeeming all of their coupons on. Speaking of cashiers, not all of them are aware of their store coupon policy. Knowing the policy in advance will make you a more confident shopper and in a world where even couponers have been hit by fraud will make the cashier feel more comfortable with you as a shopper.
#4 Shop National Brands: We didn’t get into this much in the last two posts, but to be successful at couponing (success measured by 50%-60% savings) you need to give up some loyalty. I am in no way saying that you need to give up all of your loyalty - there are many products that we do not buy unless it is name brand or a particular brand but on a lot of things I can use whatever is cheapest. Toilet paper, for example is a brand loyal product. We like Cottonelle - not Angel Soft or Charmin - Cottonelle. Cottonelle is expensive, but my tushie thinks it’s worth it, so when I can get it on a good deal I stock up as much as our budget will allow. Salad dressing however, I use for cooking with, and I can marinate chicken breasts in any brand of Italian that I need to.
#5 Don’t forget about expiration dates: Unless you are overseas military, expired coupons don’t do you any good, so find a time each month (I cull mine the first week) and pull any expired coupons you have. Along with expired coupons, if you get to the point where you are starting a stockpile of some grocery items watch those expiration dates – even if you only bought the flour for .50 a bag, it’s still a waste of money if it goes bad.
#6 Know which stores to shop at: Know the stores in your area and what they offer shoppers. Determine which stores are best to shop at and know how far or how many stores you are willing to go to. I’m lucky to be in an area where if needed in a 2 hour shopping trip with one child I can hit Walgreens, Hyvee, Target, CVS, Walmart and Price Chopper all in a less than 10 mile round trip drive (this is not an every week occurrence and a 2 hour/6 store trip only happens about every other month). I also know that Walmart will price match AND accept competitor’s coupons so if there are really good deals at all 6 places and I’m short on time I can make a one stop shop at Walmart. *I also have an Aldi’s in that drive and they always have great deals on produce – I price match those prices at Walmart.
#7 Use sales ads and smartphone applications: I love my smartphone and have downloaded quite a few apps that have been helpful in my shopping trips (I have an android based phone). I’ll list my top 3 here:
Angry Birds – A MUST if I am forced blessed to go shopping with Bug (he also likes the calculator function and it actually really good at helping me keep track of my expenses)
Grocery IQ – I love that I can scan the barcode of a product at home that we are low on and the item will be added to my grocery list. I can also send the list to my husband if he is doing the shopping. Not only can you add the category of the product but you can be brand specific as well. There are notes you can add, prices to give you a running total and it will also search for internet coupons that you can couple with the items for better deals.
CardStar – CardStar lets you store loyalty, reward and club membership cards on your phone. This means with just a few swipes of my screen I can pull up my loyalty cards and I don’t have to carry them all around on a ring.
Knowing what’s on sale is the first step to saving money. Matching sale ads with the coupons you have means greater savings and that is where couponers make a difference in their family’s budget. Breaking down an ad is as simple as looking through the ad and circling anything that you need or want and flipping through your coupons to see what matches. There are also a number of bloggers who do matchups on a weekly basis – find one for your store today!
