In CategoryNavel Gazing

I’m back, dudes.

So. Kansas.

Last Thursday I spent all day doing laundry, going to WalMart to buy Travel Treats for the kids, and dithering about how the little people were going to get along without the myriad of tiny-butt potty options we have in our house. Which one should we take? The pink portable potty? The set-it-on-the-big-seat potty seat? The two-seats-in-one seat?

Potties = GAH.

We decided to drive at night as much as possible, in the hopes that the kids would sleep a little and be less insufferable. At 6pm, we got everyone in jammies and hit the road. We stayed in Dodge City (where Marshall Dillon narrated all my thoughts), and made it to our destination in eastern Kansas on Friday around 3 in the afternoon.

You know how The Pioneer Woman always posts those fantastic pictures of the hotel rooms she stays in? The hotel rooms that are probably $500 a night?

This won’t be quite like that.

I requested a king bed + sofa bed suite. I got a weird suite-like thing that was essentially two separate rooms connected by a gigantic, probably-just-filmed-some-adult-entertainment-here jacuzzi tub. The pull-out sofa was broken beyond repair and there were no cots available. The floor was crunchy and it smelled like Cow.

All this for the low! low! price of One Hundred and Sixty Dollars a night.

I took this pic with my cell phone, which is why it’s so awful. The haze is real. It’s cow. 

I thought a little kitchenette might be behind the wall.

I was mistaken.

See? Total porno tub, right? The plastic plants lend an air of class, though.

It was AWFUL. I was pretty upset until Jim pointed out I could blog about it.