Resistance is Futile

In CategoryKnitting

When I first took up knitting, I knit a lot of these fuzzy, multi-yarn scarves. A lot. Like maybe 35 fuzzy scarves.

Just plain garter stitch and a lot of novelty yarn. I didn’t even know how to purl. I refused to pay more than $1.99 for a ball of yarn (Mmmm, acrylic!). I inflicted them on gave them to everyone I knew. 

Then I decided to grow up and do some Real Knitting. You know, knitting that did not involve size 35 needles (I did still only buy 99 cent yarn. Let’s not get carried away). I decided to knit a scarf for my husband. I found a Mistake Rib scarf that looked nice and was a simple enough pattern for me to try. I learned to purl and everything. I was happy with how it turned out, and Jim seemed pleased to receive it. 

I was so excited about this, a successful project! I immediately began peppering him with questions about what else he wanted me to knit him.

Me: Yarn! Colors! Patterns!

Him: You already knit me a scarf.

Me: ?

Him: I only need one scarf.

Me: Dude, I have invested tens of dollars (heh) into this new hobby and you think you are going to escape with only one scarf? 

I mean, really. 

I didn’t argue, but secretly devised a Campaign of Conversion.

I took a sock class and began extolling the virtues of the hand-knit sock.

I took him to a football game on one of the coldest days of the year and heroically presented him with a fold-up-brim merino wool hat knit with team colors. I even made a matching one for myself, and I hate football.


I let him in on the mysteries of felting.

I made hats for the kids to look cute in.

And then….

Finally, after over a year of waiting, I heard the words I had been waiting for – 

“I might like you to knit me some socks”


Probably I should go shopping…

In CategoryNavel Gazing

Nah. We can make it another day.

First Officer’s Log

In CategoryNavel Gazing

Stardate: HolyCrapIsItFridayYet

We are being sucked into the gravity of planet BigWhinerNaughyPants. It is unknown how well the ship will fare if we are stuck on this planet for very long. We will try to survive by using our reserves of Dinosaur Train, but supplies are running low.

If anyone out there is considering launching a rescue mission, please bring cookies and those tiny bottles of liquor.

Fear and uncertainty grip the crew.

My Marriage Survived a Kitchen Remodel

In CategoryNavel Gazing

We remodeled our kitchen last summer (just in time for the market to tank. yay). Our house was built in the 70’s and most everything was original when we moved in about 3 years ago. I say most everything because the last owner did make one significant change to the kitchen.
She put carpet in.
Apparently her feet would get cold. A lot of people would say, “Hey! Socks!” But she went the carpet route. 

After a few months with two kids under 3 eating in a carpeted kitchen, I couldn’t take it anymore and we ripped it (and the previously undiscovered TWO MORE LAYERS of carpet) out and got some cheap peel-and-stick tile at Home Depot. It’s just not right to VACUUM your kitchen. 

When we first started the remodel, Jim was all “I’ll take next week off and we’ll do a bunch of the work ourselves.”
Then FRIDAY NIGHT, he switches to “yeah, I can’t take any days off.”
Then MONDAY MORNING, he says to me “by the way, I’m probably going to have to work a bunch of nights this week.”
I’m sure you can imagine my response to these announcements and I don’t have to bore you with all the cursing details. 

The Before:

THREE LAYERS of wallpaper! Fluorescent lighting! Thirty year old cabinets with that one drawer that fell out and broke my foot every time I opened it! 

We bought the dishwasher before we even moved in because I would not wash baby bottles and pumping equipment in a dishwasher from 1977. We bought the stove when the old one (harvest gold!) was down to one working burner and the oven ruined three batches of muffins in a row. The stainless steel table was something we bought at the restaurant supply store for a hundred bucks to give me more counter space. 

I miss this kitchen a little. 


The Middle:


The middle was very hard. I had two kids that needed to eat every fifteen minutes. I had no stove, no sink, and no dishwasher. We were eating out or microwaving macaroni & cheese in the dining room (more carpet!) I was doing dishes in the bathroom. It was disgusting. There was not enough bleach in the world to make me feel better about it. We could not get the THREE layers of wallpaper off, and had to call a guy and throw money at him to rescue us. It was six weeks of “I swear I’ll call a divorce lawyer if you ever suggest buying a fixer again.”

The After:

So. Much. Better. 

Now there is more counterspace and more storage space. Porcelain tile, engineered quartz countertops, and my favorite part –

The trash can pulls out! Seriously, this makes me happy every time I use it. No more cramming the trash under the sink or sticking the can in the doorway to the dining school room – I just scrape all the bread crusts and vegetable peels right into the can. 

Now if only I could figure out a way to keep it this clean. I actually wrote the first part of this post a long time ago, but the kitchen has never been clean enough to take After pictures. And probably never will be again.

This post is linked to Touring Tuesdays at Our Life in Words.