It’s Probably Her Dad’s Fault…

In CategoryCooking, Navel Gazing

Last night, my daughter was trying to take her barrettes out of her hair for a bath. She was having trouble and completely matter-of-factly, she said, “I need some help with my freaking hair.”  


I added a new page to the sidebar. I decided to convert my recipes to .pdf files and keep them all in one place. They are now on the Printable Recipes page, along with my Freezer Cooking Manifesto Tutorial.

Also, today is the final installment of my series on Freezer Cooking over at Modern Alternative Mama. It finishes detailing how I put over 70 dinners in my freezer in the month of July. Check it out.

That is all. See you tomorrow. I have to take care of some of the stuff on my To Do list. Blech. Cleaning out the schoolroom is my big goal for today. Oh, yeah – AND QUIT SWEARING.

Damn it.

In Which I am Grouchy and Uptight

In CategoryCooking, Navel Gazing

Ok, so I am still working of stocking my freezer. Jim’s stupid business trip messed up my rhythm and I am trying to get my mojo back so I can finish cooking and start watching more teevee. 

This morning I spent some time cruising the internets, figuring out what I want to cook, and making a grocery list. I have an idea for a sort of Beef Burgundy knock-off I want to play around with, and I am planning on making an Irish Beef and Stout Stew. I saw this amazing looking recipe at Alli-n-Son for Beer Batter Pizza Dough that sounds pretty delish too. 

So first I had to hit the liquor store. We don’t drink, but I cook with wine occasionally. When I go to the liquor store I either feel like Posh Grown-Up or Party Animal College Student, depending on if I go to the fancy wine store or that place with the bars over the painted-out windows. But then I ruin it by asking for the cheapest wine they have, and I go back to my normal Frumpy Housewife self. Today, as I came out of the store, clutching my plain, brown paper bag, I slipped and fell off the curb. Right outside the liquor store. At 11 am. Because I am Graceful and Classy like that. 

People noticed. 

Maybe because after stumbling out of the liquor store, I got in my car?

Then I drove 20 miles to the only decent grocery store around here, bought supplies for my Big Soup Cooking Extravaganza and about $40 worth of grapes for the kids. 

Here’s the thing. When I unload my cart, I unload it in the order in which I want it bagged, because I am a completely normal, very relaxed person. I put all the heavy canned stuff on first, keep all the cold foods together, and put the produce on last. Sometimes I ask them to be careful with the produce, which gets me nothing but hostile looks and smushed bananas. Today, the checker tossed all 6 pounds of grapes into one bag, and then topped it off with some onions and mushrooms. I could feel myself wincing. When the bagger finally came over, I asked her if she would mind undoing that bag and bagging everything separately. She gave me a funny look, but did as I asked. Which worked out great, because that way she could spread all the grapes and the kiwis and the mushrooms in an even layer in the bottom of the cart before she piled all the potatoes and canned goods on top. 

And after I paid and went to collect my cart, I was so shocked that I blurted out, “DUDE. You can’t put a gallon of ice cream on top of twelve dollars worth of grapes!” And then I felt bad. Because she was like eleven years old and has probably never spent her own hard earned money on seasonal produce before. I was fuming so much on the drive home, that I missed the turn into the Starbucks drive-thru.

Oh well. At least we have ice cream in the house now. And by “we” I mean “me” because I snuck it into the freezer in the garage before the kids saw it.

In Which I Blather On About Television

In CategoryNavel Gazing

This is not going to be a post about the evils of television.

Or how we don’t have one and consider ourselves to be Clearly Superior Non-TV Watching People, even though we get Netflix and watch stuff all day long on youTube (a distinction without a difference, but whatever).


This is going to be a post about how much I love television.

I do.

I love it.

I limit it with the kids, and am really pretty strict about the quantity and content they are allowed to watch. But the minute they are in bed, my husband and I turn to each other and say Can We Watch TeeVee Now? We even eat our dinner on the couch like heathens. We were married for 11 years before our son came along, so some habits die hard. Eventually we will move to that Family Dinner paradigm and I will morph into June Cleaver. But not yet.

Let us begin:

I think cable has better programming than the networks. I actually enjoy the summertime cable shows more than the beginning of the fall season on the networks. Cable does not rely as heavily on innuendos and pushing the boundaries as much as network television does. There are actual storylines to be found. There is a lot of educational programming that is interesting and entertaining. The cable channels will give shows a fighting chance, and not cancel them after three episodes. Sometimes Certain People like those shows and don’t think they deserve to be cancelled just because they were on opposite American Idol (will that show just GO AWAY already).

  • I love the Real Housewives. You might have previously thought I was joking, but I CANNOT get enough of that crap! It makes me feel so happy and superior. I shoo everyone outside, sink into the couch, and surrender to the lovely awfulness. Sometimes I yell, “OH MY GOSH YOU STUPID COW!” at the screen.
  • I love The Closer. I have liked Kyra Sedgewick ever since she kicked that one guy in the crotch in that one movie. She is terrific. And Fritz is hot. The end.
  • Also Burn Notice. Humorous, action-packed, and another hot guy. HOT.
  • Not to mention – In Plain Sight, The Glades, White Collar, Covert Affair, Psych….all with storylines, humor, and hotties.
  • Weekends are for getting my allowance of snark from The Soup and catching up on the latest Kardashian debacle. 

So there you have it. I love teevee. I understand if you don’t want to be seen with me anymore…

Spam Spam Spammity Spam

In CategoryNavel Gazing

I love checking my spam filter. I don’t really understand why businesses use spam, or why they don’t have an actual person with a working knowledge of punctuation write their crap, but at least it’s entertaining. Here’s a great one –

 This is a good post, I stumbled across your story while looking for popular lyrics. Thanks for sharing, I’ll be sure to return regularly. 

I mean, sure – if you’re looking for the lyrics to all those Backyardigan songs that I can’t get out of my head, then come on back. 

Your web site is extremely fascinating,I desire to communicate with u,could i sent e mail to you?


 This is the best one so far, though – 

I have not seen as far as others because giants were standing on my shoulders

Giants! On his shoulders! It could mean anything! It might even be brilliant! Or maybe a popular song lyric? I should get those two spammer-bots together. It could be a match made in cyber heaven.